Depression

Been a bad few days.....Or to be more accurate, a bad 45 years. Not doing well since my road trip to Kamloops/ Kellowna.....Like a burr under the saddle, my thoughts are at unease. Even my walks with Hannah are mostly filled with blackness. Not fair to Hannah......She is so deserving of a better "Master". I feel most days I just disappoint her and make her unhealthy in mind and body. I worry she has gained weight because of my inability to cope and be more of a "playmate" that she needs. I know she wants (and needs) more "rough" play. Chasing her soccer or rugby balls. It takes so little to make her happy, but I cannot muster the energy  or enthusiasm to facilitate even the few short minutes of effort required. We used to play often at the "Biting Daddy" game. Now, it seems I don't have the will to participate except for a few seconds at a time.......and very rarely, if at all. I suck. I cannot help but think that she would be better off with someone else. Someone healthy. I certainly am not.

Bad night

Well, the show at the Yale was a bust for me.....Bad stomach....Had to leave before my set. I can only blame it on lack of sleep. I usually hit the sack around 8 pm and the show was just getting started around then. Usually not a problem, I just try to get a nap in before I leave for the gig. But the guy was here for the fireplace earlier yesterday and I never had a decent rest. Plus a pile of stress from the day. Hannah let me sleeep in this A.M...(after 7:00) Then let me get away with a super short walk. I think she knew her fire was waiting for her at home and despite the brief exposure to the elements, we were both SOAKED by the time we got back. She is glued to the bed in front of the fireplace at the moment, and she will be for the next while I'm sure. Nice to have the fire back.

First Blog/ Yale Show Tomorrow Night

Just trying to get the hang of this........I miss my 8 Track Hi-Fi Stereo System. Big show at the Yale Hotel in Vancouver December 8th. Grad for the new class from Stand-Up For Mental Health. Should be a blast. The alumni will be doing short sets and showing support for the Current class.